Chris: Dad, there's a guy outside who says I can't go to school.
Peter: Yeah? Him and what army?
Chris: The U.S. Army.
Peter: ...that's a good army.
[Peter and Brian are touring the Pawtucket Brewery]
Peter Griffin: Wow, it's like I died and went to heaven, then God realized it wasn't my time yet, so He sent me back to a brewery.
[Death holds up Peter's death certificate]
Peter Griffin: Where did you get that?
Death: It was e-mailed to me by your HMO.
Bonnie Swanson: Somebody save him, he can't swim!
Peter Griffin: Oh, he's not even kicking. Kick Joe, kick.
Lois Griffin: Peter, he's a paraplegic!
Peter Griffin: That doesn't mean he can't hear. Kick Joe, kick!
come one come all, she floats like a butterfly and stings like I pee
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